21 Comments
User's avatar
Helayne Spivak's avatar

GREAT last line.

Expand full comment
Patty Riddlebarger's avatar

Ha! can only imagine your sister's consternation were she to learn that the French word for the most feminine part of the female body is a masculine noun!!

Expand full comment
Richard Goodman's avatar

I hesitate to tell her! 😂

Expand full comment
PHILIPPE MISTELI's avatar

I would recommend " devant LE sacré Coeur "

Expand full comment
Richard Goodman's avatar

Of course.

Expand full comment
Marina Osipova's avatar

Ha-ha! Your sister is convincing. But might the French take action, that would be a disaster for many other languages if they follow the suit. In Russian, I want the sun to be neutral, the Earth and a star feminine, the man masculine . . . Please, ask your sister not to interfere.

Expand full comment
Richard Goodman's avatar

She's her own woman!

Expand full comment
Elizabeth Godfrey's avatar

Ha! Your sister has a point. Sex-ing nouns is random insanity and darn difficult to memorize. And the German add a "neuter" category. On second though, they may have been ahead of their time...

Expand full comment
Richard Goodman's avatar

German? Don't get me started.

Expand full comment
Elizabeth Godfrey's avatar

Who was it said, "I'd rather decline 3 drinks than 1 German article!" ?

Expand full comment
John Hazlett's avatar

Funny! And lest we feel too superior, we should note that English genders some objects---ships, for example. Though we only see that gender when we employ a pronoun.

Expand full comment
Richard Goodman's avatar

Yes....but. Those genders we employ are by tradition not by rule. I once got admonished by a NY Times reader when, in an op-ed, I referred to my bicycle as "she."

Expand full comment
John Hazlett's avatar

Ha! And a righteous admonition it was! Everyone knows that bicycles are "he's." 😉

Expand full comment
Marilyn Moss Rockefeller's avatar

I agree with your sister. Why complicate language with definite articles when our minds are already full of trivia? But I have to admit, I love the sound of the Romance languages where the definite articles add a certain rhythm.

Expand full comment
Richard Goodman's avatar

Yes, I do, too.

Expand full comment
Sarah Van Arsdale's avatar

wonderful hilarious ending! just the other night I was talking with a Mexican friend about how the "gender" embedded in Spanish isn't about gender as we think of it, as pertaining to the gender of a person. It's grammar. And now that I've finally gotten somewhere with learning Spanish, I'm not about to forget everything about saying "el pomelo" or "los cacahuetes" ...and come to think of it, why are Mexican cacahuetes masculine, and French are feminine? Only because that's the rule of the language. And Chinese has no genders---one word, "ta" for he, she, him her.

Expand full comment
Richard Goodman's avatar

Yes, the wild and wacky world of languages! Mexican peanuts are probably more macho than French peanuts. Chinese? Fuhgettaboutit.

Expand full comment
Nancy Harmon Jenkins's avatar

Wonderful insights! I learned long ago that gender identification persists across all Romance languages. So if an orange is feminine in french, it is also in italian and spanish. But tell your sister that german has three genders--masc, fem, and neutral. How about that?

Expand full comment
Richard Goodman's avatar

That might send her over the edge. No wonder Twain wrote his delightful essay, "That Awful German Language."

Expand full comment
Judith Harmon Miller's avatar

Clever. I guessed where you were going, but was surprised I was right. Clever.

Expand full comment
Richard Goodman's avatar

Just pushing a broom, Judy, pushing a broom.

Expand full comment